Zachary’s View: Growing Up in a Foster Family

Boy running through field. Title: "Zachary's View" Growing Up in a Foster Family"

Living with Foster Siblings

I’m 12 years old, and my family has been fostering since I was four — so for most of my life. Right now, we’re fostering a boy called R. He’s as close to a brother as I could imagine. We’ve grown up together since we were both five, and our bond is something I wouldn’t have had without fostering.

A few weeks ago, we also had another foster child, G, who was three when he left. That experience was amazing for me too — I helped him learn to speak and grow in confidence. It felt good to know I had a part in that.

What I Love About Being Part of a Foster Family

One of the best things about fostering is knowing that I’m helping children who haven’t had the same chances I’ve had. I get to share my home, my family, and my life with them. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it.

Some of my favourite memories have been with R — especially when we went on our first holiday abroad together to Spain. That trip made me feel like we were just like any other siblings, and I’m looking forward to many more memories like that.

The Challenges Birth Children Face

Sometimes, being the birth child in a foster family can feel like you’re invisible. It’s hard when people don’t realise how much we do behind the scenes. My sister and I share not just our parents, but our entire lives with the children who come into our home.

Here are just a few ways we help:

• Welcoming new children and helping them settle in.

• Giving them someone to play with, which really matters.

• Being a positive distraction from the difficult things they’ve been through.

Despite this, it sometimes feels like our role isn’t recognised. For example, during Cambridgeshire’s Children in Care Day, foster children get awards for their achievements, which is great, but we don’t, even though we’ve played a big part in their journey.

Another example is the independent visitor programme. Foster children get matched with someone who takes them out for a treat or fun activity. But I never get to go, even though I think I’ve earned it too. Recently, my foster brother had to wait so long for a visitor that our mum arranged for my uncle to take us both out. That made me happy – no one was left out.

Why I’m Proud to Be Part of Apex Fostering

I really love the agency my parents foster through; Apex Fostering. The owner, Sali, is amazing. They treats all of us equally. For example, at Christmas or on our birthdays, they give me an Amazon gift card just like they do for the foster children. That makes me feel seen and appreciated.

When they organise trips, they always invite me too. They makes it clear that we’re all valued, and if I ever need someone to talk to, they're there. I’ve spoken to them before and I know I can trust them.

Thinking About Fostering?

If you’ve ever thought about becoming a foster carer, Zach’s story shows just how much fostering can shape a whole family. It’s not always easy — but it’s incredibly meaningful.

At Apex, we support not just foster children and carers, but birth children too. We believe every voice matters in the fostering journey.

Want to find out more about fostering with Apex? We’re here to talk, answer your questions, and support you every step of the way.

Let’s have a conversation. You might just change a life – including your own.

Let's Chat About Fostering